Today is a good day overall– it’s beautiful outside and I have a lot to be thankful for.  On the other hand, it is a difficult day for me. 

Today would mark the 26th birthday of my friend Ryan Hoffa, who passed away in an unexpected accident on a Sunday morning in August.  He was too young and it shocked everyone; I still find myself forgetting that he’s gone.  While I think of Ryan every single day, I am trying my best to learn something from all of the sadness.  Everyone has heard the “life is short” lecture a million times; and while it is true, I think there’s a lot more beneath the surface.

The main thing I have learned from Ryan’s life ending so abruptly is that I shouldn’t be afraid of death.  I have always secretly been a little bit scared and have pushed the idea that I could suddenly die at any moment to the back of my mind.  I didn’t like to think about it.  I have always thought, I’m young… I’ll think about all of that later.  I can’t do that anymore.  I need to live a life that I am proud of, and know that at any point in time I am happy with the choices I have made and the way I have treated others.  This is the way I should be living anyway– but now I realize this more than I ever have. 

Ryan helped make me a better person.  He helped me realized that I should thank people for the things they do for me, let people know I appreciate them, and tell people how much they mean to me and how they make my life special.  I have found myself transform into a more sentimental person than I thought I was before because I appreciate the events and situations that make me happy a lot more.  This is really what life is about.

It’s easier for me to step outside, take a deep breath, smile, and realize how lucky I am– to be alive and to be living a life that makes me fulfilled.  Thanks Ryan.  I miss you!

This is a silly picture my friend Andrew took at my wedding that ended up being on of my favorites. If you look in the background to the right, you can see Ryan studying his lines before he presented a reading at our wedding. He did a wonderful job and I am proud that he was a big part of the day.
This is a silly picture my friend Andrew took at my wedding that ended up being one of my favorites. If you look in the background to the right, you can see Ryan studying his lines before he presented a reading at our wedding. He did a wonderful job and I am proud that he was a big part of the day.

…Because you can learn a lot from friends even if they are no longer here to teach you…